Not for me, thank you!

Friends, I’ve had it.

I’ve officially crossed the line into dark territory.

I do not like being engaged.

Let me be clear: I absolutely am thrilled and ecstatic to be marrying Fernando. Oh, words cannot describe how that makes me feel. A bit like this.

But this? This constant everyone-and-their-sister giving me advice? Acquaintances from high school telling me they’ll be expecting an invitation? Friends telling me that I need to make decisions now because we’ve been engaged for a few weeks? None for me, thank you.

I don’t like this at all. No. From complete strangers to people at my new job that I barely even know, everyone is giving me advice. I don’t want it. Any of it. These people barely know me, and yet they judge me. And the funniest thing of all? We haven’t even made plans yet! And they’re judging THAT!

I’ve already gotten in arguments with some of my favorite people over this stuff, and I have had it. It’s heartbreaking that such a significant change in my life is causing so much drama. I’m about to ban all wedding conversation in person, via email, via Facebook, via text, via ANYTHING until it is over and done.

I do not like being the center of attention, and these people that barely know me (let alone Fernando) don’t seem to understand that I’m not interested in having 500 of my “closest” friends over for a party. I don’t give a flying fart in space about centerpieces, and I sure as heck do NOT plan to have a first dance. Also? If I haven’t talked to you since we were 14, why do you keep asking me when to expect your invitation? And Facebook- STOP ADVERTISING WEDDING DRESSES TO ME. In two languages, no less!!!!!

Perhaps we shall just fly off to Hogwarts and never come back.